It’s almost World War One?

As regular Blogees (people who don’t visit at least 4 times a day suck, by the way) will no doubt have noticed, more than 1900 hits have been contracted by my blog, which means that if my number of blog hist were the year, it would be 1901, the year in which Australia became one nation, and Queen Victoria died. Thus, it is time for  a super-special blog. Which brings us to the epic poem, which I (your glorious proletarian blogger) wrote in Year 10 (featuring half-hearted attempts at rhyming, before degenerating into an epic free verse).

Poem of poems and places like Nome

This little poem,
Was written in Nome,
By a little green gnome,
Who lived in an orange dome.

That dome,
Somewhere in Nome,
Is possessed by,
The devil’s pet fly.

The previous two stanzas,
Do not involve panzers,
Have nothing to do with this poem,
And are all lies

Lies,
Concocted by little green flies,
Who may use the Deutsche Mark,
But don’t live in Denmark

So we live on an Island,
Which is nowhere near Ireland,
But we don’t use the Deutsche Mark,
Even though, ZEALAND IS IN DENMARK.

The Falklands are an archipelago situated in the southern Atlantic Ocean.
No one there can make a magic potion,
Unlike Harry Potter.
Or that pot plant that nearly knocked me unconscious.

As far as I know this poem has no deep spiritual meaning,
Or worshipped by green gnomes,
Which live in orange domes,
Who write nonsensical poems.

So on this island,
Which is not to be confused with Ireland,
Or Iceland or greenland or Scotland,
Or England or even Taumatawhakatangihangakoauauotamateapokaiwhenuakitanatahu.

So this is the end,
i won’t go to Tailem Bend,
I will go to Alaska,
Or maybe Nebraska.

Taumatawhakatangihangakoauauotamateapokaiwhenuakitanatahu,
It’s the longest place name in the world,
It tells a story about some Maori hero person,
And his nose flute.

THE END!!!

As you can see, the younger version of myself was clearly insane (this has not changed very much, seemingly). It was actually submitted for an English Assignment, and it received a C.

I’ll put the North back in Northern Ireland!

As opposed to putting the Ire back in the Republic of Ireland. Or the pub back in the Republic of Ireland. Or the way back in Norway. Or the Den back in Sweden. Or the Eric back in the United States of Canada. Or the Can back in Canada (that sounds ridiculous like a political slogan). Or the Octopus back is Australia (Was there ever an Octopus in Australia, you ask? Well surely you’ve all been to an aquarium at some point…).

(Found here, which is a quite excellent place)

Replace Britannia and Columbia with a Minister and that looks suspiciously like a marriage ceremony.

Regardless, the turn around in Anglo-American relations in the (particularly late) 19th century is quite amazing. It was sealed by the entry of the USA into World War I, which, despite the mass incompetence of the US Army’s leaders, was a massive Morale boost for the allies. It was still a close run thing, though.

I want a laser eyed sphinx. What I would use it for, that shall be left open for guessing.